THE DANGER OF SPIRITUAL DESTITUTION
(Matthew 19:8)

Many may wonder why singles ministry is important. Many question its validity. Many singles feel that they can do without it. Many feel that singles gathering for ministry is nothing more than a "meat market". Well, I used to feel that way too. It wasn't until the Lord graced me to come to a singles ministry service, touched my heart and changed my life that I really began fulfilling God's call on my life.

Singles ministry is not about finding a spouse (although courtship and marital issues need to be discussed and are discussed at many services). The purpose of TRUE singles ministry is to help unmarried believers attend upon the Lord without distraction (e.g., discipleship enhancement, 1 Corinthians 7:35).

Taking advantage of the "single" season is essential to success in Christ. It is also essential to success in marriage, as highlighted by Jesus in Matthew 19:8. Jesus stated, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so. One day I was reading and this phrase caught my attention, so I looked it up. What I discovered astounded me. "Hardness of the heart" actually means "to be destitute of spiritual perception"!!! We'll just refer to it as "spiritual destitution".

People cite many reasons for failed marriages within the body of Christ - immaturity, selfishness, adultery and fornication, defraud, abuse, boredom, etc. You can probably think of more, but regardless of how many you can list, ALL of them actually find their root in Jesus' statement. All of them are the result of spiritual destitution. Those in Christ who do not place Christ first by seeking the kingdom of God and His righteousness are subject to being spiritually destitute and the pain that comes along with it.

Let's look at spiritual destitution from three angles: 1) identifying it; 2) it's effects and 3) the benefits of overcoming it.

IDENTIFYING SPIRITUAL DESTITUTION

What is destitution? Words that illustrate destitution are poverty, deprivation and impoverishment. We can say that a person who is spiritually destitute is lacking in the area of his/her spirituality. Someone may say, "We're all destitute." Well, in a way we are, but some function spiritually and some do not. Some, having done all to stand.stand, while others spend the vast majority of their time falling and they can't get up. Some submit themselves to God and resist the devil, while others crawl into "the corner of the ring" and take a beating without even hitting the enemy back. The latter in each of these examples denotes someone who is spiritually destitute - lacking knowledge, strength, will, fortitude, wisdom, power, etc. Lack in any of these areas will put us at risk.

Looking back at Matthew 19:8, when asked why Moses gave the children of Israel a bill of divorce, Jesus stated, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so. God never intended for His people to divorce. The cause of permissiveness was men being destitute of spiritual perception. Men sought divorce -- not because their wives became unattractive to them, but because they actually didn't have the spiritual wherewithal to fulfill the marriage covenant.

After hearing that statement and before we go any further, some of you are probably wondering about people who aren't saved that have happy and successful marriages. Guess what? Not that they're condemned, but they're not fulfilling marital covenant according to the plan of God. It's because judgment begins at the house of God (God's people) that the issues in this article don't apply to them. Unsaved husbands don't love their wives as Christ loved the church. Even if they happen to love their wives with a sacrificial love, they're not doing it in Jesus' style. They don't serve as priests in their home. They're not helping raise a godly seed. The best wives aren't functioning as quintessential helpmeets because they aren't helping their husbands fulfill the vision that God's given him (they don't have a vision from God to support). They're not striving to have a meek and quiet spirit and winning over roughshod husbands by their manner of life. The desire for their husband (the desire to rule him) is active and without restraint. Unsaved married couples might be happy, but they are not fulfilling (or seeking) the perfect will of God.

Peter speaks of perception and its importance in 2 Peter 1:9. He mentions several elements that should be active in the life of a Christian. They are: 1) diligence; 2) faith; 3) virtue; 4) knowledge; 5) temperance; 6) patience; 7) godliness; 8) brotherly kindness and 9) charity. He went on to say, For if these things be in you, and abound, they make you that ye shall neither be barren nor unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. But he that lacketh these things is blind, and cannot see afar off , and hath forgotten that he was purged from his old sins. This is the portrait of a person who is spiritually destitute. To lack these things is to live beneath one's privilege in the Lord.

The Effects of Spiritual Destitution

• Solomon's Commentary (Proverbs 6:32): But whoso committeth adultery with a woman lacketh understanding: he that doeth it destroyeth his own soul. I once attended a singles ministry service at one of our neighboring churches where a brother stated how important it was to him that he had a wife that always gave him something to look at. He stated that this would keep him from looking elsewhere and displeasing God. After his statement, however, Proverbs 6:32 was presented. My brothers and sisters, you can have the best looking spouse in the world, but Solomon made it very clear that people who commit adultery lack understanding. He said nothing about them lacking attraction to their mate. Is attraction important? Of course it is. The person you marry should be (and will be) appealing to you, but looks are not what keeps someone from committing adultery. Properly spiritual perception and loving the Lord Jesus Christ with all your heart does! Husbands are commanded to love their wives and not to be bitter towards them (Colossians 3:19). Wives are commanded to submit themselves to their husbands as it is fit in the Lord (Colossians 3:18). This also takes understanding. Successful husbands and wives don't look at one another during times of trouble/stress and say, "My spouse is so attractive that I'll love them anyway, even though they're getting on my nerves." It's the love of God that gets people through these things - keeping His commandments (1 John 5:3).

• Michal's Downfall (2 Samuel 6:16): And as the ark of the LORD came into the city of David, Michal Saul's daughter looked through a window, and saw king David leaping and dancing before the LORD; and she despised him in her heart. Why was Michal so upset? David was rejoicing because the ark was finally being returned unto Israel. This was cause for great celebration. Michal seemed to have no regard for this event, nor did she properly receive her husband's display of joy. As David headed home to bless his household, instead of being welcomed, his wife greeted him with disdain and disrespect -- because of her spiritual condition. This "spiritual destitution" cost Michal greatly. Instead of receiving the blessing of the Lord, she was cursed and was barren for the rest of her life.

• Samson's Misguided Determination (Judges 14:2): And he came up, and told his father and his mother, and said, I have seen a woman in Timnath of the daughters of the Philistines: now therefore get her for me to wife. Even though the scriptures declare that the Lord had a hand in the Samson/Delilah issue, this does not take Samson "off the hook" for his desire of a strange (ungodly) woman. His parents tried to turn his attention towards the daughters of the children of Israel, but for some reason, he was determined to have Delilah. What did she do to him? What was it about Delilah that caused Samson to "crave" her? We don't know for sure. What we do know about Samson, however, is that he was a single man who was, unfortunately, sexually active (Judges 16:1). Samson's unchaste sexual appetite eventually cost him his life. Why do I say that? Hosea 4:11 says, Whoredom and wine and new wine take away the heart. Involvement in misguided and unlawful sexual activity has an effect on the part of us that God has instructed us to KEEP WITH ALL DILIGENCE. We can't afford to allow our heart to be taken away. It's all we have. Singles, strive to keep yourselves sexually. Remember, God will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you're able to handle. Be like Joseph and flee fornication. A blessing waits for those who endure.

The Overcomer's Reward

• Job's Maintenance (Job 2:10): But he said unto her, Thou speakest as one of the foolish women speaketh. What? shall we receive good at the hand of God, and shall we not receive evil? In all this did not Job sin with his lips. This discourse between Job and his wife serves as a great example of someone who maintained his spiritual health and integrity under pressure (and how everyone else was blurred by it as well). Job had already been through a lot. To add insult to injury, his wife tells him, Dost thou still retain thine integrity? curse God, and die (this act of destitution is similar to that of Michal's). At this point, Job's wife was not a helpmeet for Job - she was a hindrance. This was a harsh, narrow-sighted statement that was obviously displeasing to God. Instead of reacting in the flesh, however, Job reproves his wife and maintains his integrity. He stated, Thou speakest as one of the foolish women speaketh. What? shall we receive good at the hand of God, and shall we not receive evil? In all this, Job sinned not with his lips. Job was spiritually healthy. He continued to love his wife, despite provocation. He continued to bless God also. His heart for forgiveness was manifested as he prayed for his friends. Lastly, he maintained a tender heart toward God. This is confirmed by his willingness to receive correction and instruction at the hand of the Lord - through it all. Let's be like Job. Let's maintain our integrity. Our spiritual perception depends on it.

• Joseph's Hearing From God Just in the Nick of Time (Matthew 1:20) : But while he thought on these things, behold, the angel of the Lord appeared unto him in a dream, saying, Joseph, thou son of David, fear not to take unto thee Mary thy wife: for that which is conceived in her is of the Holy Ghost. This situation illustrates another example of what proper perception will do for us. The word of God tells us that Joseph was a godly man. In the little that we read about Joseph, we see God consistently and successfully communicating with him . It takes a proper walk with God to hear him in the right manner. The Bible declares, He that is of God heareth God's words (John 8:47). Joseph, being in a position to hear, was able to comprehend the word of God recorded in Matthew 1:20. He was about to divorce his fiancée. This shows us how serious an engagement was. If Joseph had not heard the message from the angel and been obedient, Mary would have been in danger, as she was with child and unmarried. Joseph's healthy spiritual perception saved his relationship with Mary. Just as Joseph benefitted, so also will we benefit if our ability to hear God and respond to his leading is healthy.
  
  
• Esther's Balance of Beauty and Character (Esther 2:7): Esther (Hadassah) was a breath of fresh air for King Ahasuerus. His previous wife, Vashti, was a woman of great beauty. In Chapter 1 of Esther, we see that though she was extremely beautiful, she lacked character. She refused to respond to a request of the king to show herself to the people. Her defiance greatly displeased the king and it was declared that she would never come before him again. It was also feared that her disgraceful act would influence other wives. Esther was later brought before the king to be considered for a wife. She was very beautiful and immediately found favor with him. She was eventually made queen instead of Vashti. Ahhh, but Esther was more than beautiful! She had great character. It was this character that God used to save the entire nation of Israel. She had favor with God. She had favor with her husband the king. She also had favor with all who looked upon her (Esther 2:15). She knew how to bridle her tongue (she never discussed the fact that she was a Jewess). She was wise and had great insight, exemplified by calling the fast before she went in unto Ahasuerus. She was timely - exemplified by the manner in which she approached the king and when she did it. Lastly, she was a great intercessor and exemplified it by standing in the gap for the Israelites. Her character and steadfastness blessed king Ahasuerus and the entire nation of Israel. Sisters, are you just a woman of great beauty or are you adorned with character and good works also? Are you a blessing to all those around you? Do you use your beauty to manipulate and seduce or do you obtain things by honor and integrity? Esther's "parade of blessings" is an example of what can happen when we overcome spiritual destitution.

Conclusion

God's will for us is that our spiritual perception be healthy, flourishing and accurate. He doesn't want us to be like the Pharisees and Sadducees - having eyes and ears, but unable to see and hear what the Spirit is saying to the church. This sentiment is also illustrated in Philippians 1:9-11: And this I pray, that your love may abound yet more and more in knowledge and in all judgment; That ye may approve things that are excellent; that ye may be sincere and without offence till the day of Christ; Being filled with the fruits of righteousness, which are by Jesus Christ, unto the glory and praise of God. This, my friends, is the portrait of the person with healthy spiritual perception.

Many who plan to be married don't maintain their spirituality. Because of this, when they get married, they are basically "sitting ducks" for the enemy. They don't see when he's planting seeds of destruction. They don't maintain the level of forbearance necessary to overcome the devil in the home. People who are spiritually destitute don't prefer others before themselves. Being subject to any degree of selfishness is grounds for trouble in the home. Those who are blind and hard-hearted aren't concerned with keeping the covenant of marriage and are liable to do anything, but those who embrace the love of Christ and the will of the Father are in a position to abound in blessings.

Singles, give diligence to make your calling and election sure (stable). The result of this will be a godly man or woman and godliness is profitable unto all things, having promise of the life that now is, and of that which is to come. Godliness will benefit you towards things that pertain to the kingdom of God, as well as in your dealings in this world - including marriage.

While you're still single, seal your success by making the most of this time in your life. Spend time in the word of God. Be consistent and steadfast in your prayer life. Maintain a pure heart before the Lord. In so doing these things, your perception will remain sharp and you'll see the things God has intended for you to see. You'll be able to escape from all the snares of the wicked one.

Remember, God doesn't want us to be spiritually destitute, but He has ordained that we have life and that more abundantly. He is standing by to make all grace abound toward us that we will have all sufficiency in all things. This will we do IF we press toward the mark of the prize of the high calling in Christ Jesus. Then will we overcome spiritual destitution and walk in victory in the name of the Lord Jesus.

Until next time, keep the word and be blessed!